Weissbrot mit Kummel or Widerlicher Ausserirdischer Schleimer

So this bread is called Weissbrot mit Kummel.  I don’t speak German, but I can make a guess that it’s white bread with something called Kummel, which probably is caraway seeds given the ingredients. Nothing in the name or his instructions prepared be for the disgusting nature of this dough.  I found it utterly repulsive, so much in fact that I emailed my friend, Sasha, and asked him how to say “disgusting alien slime” in German because that would be an appropriate name for this bread.  The long and short of the story is: Bernard Clayton may call this bread Weissbrot mit Kummel, but I call it Widerlicher Ausserirdischer Schleimer (aka Disgusting Alien Slime).  With that said, it was a nice bread and tastes much better than one would think Widerlicher Ausserirdischer Schleimer would. 

Widerlicher Ausserirdischer Schleimer [one large round loaf]

Bernard Clayton

INGREDIENTS

4 cups bread flour, approximately

2 packages dry yeast

2 teaspoons sugar

3/4 cup hot milk (120°-130°)

2 eggs, room temperature

1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, room temperature

2 teaspoons salt

1 tablespoon caraway seeds

BAKING SHEET: 1 baking sheet, Teflon, or greased, or sprinkled with cornmeal

In a large mixing bowl combine 3 cups flour, the yeast, and sugar and form a well in the center. Pour in the hot milk. With a large wooden spoon or mixer flat beater pull the flour into the liquid to form a batter. Beat in the eggs, one at a time, then the butter and salt. Work the dough by hand and add flour until it forms a rough mass.

Form a rough ball and rest it on the bottom of the bowl.

FIRST RISING: 15 mins

Fill the bowl with water (70°) to cover the dough by 2". The dough will slowly rise to the surface of the water as it ferments (and creates gas), about 15 minutes. (Hence the disgusting alien slime nature of this dough.)

Remove the dough from the water and pat dry with paper toweling.

Place the dough on a floured work surface, punch down, and knead out the bubbles. (And there will be bubbles!) Work in the caraway seeds. Keep the dough sprinkled with flour to control the stickiness- if you can! Continue to work and knead the dough by hand until it is smooth and elastic, about 10 minutes.

SECOND RISING: 35 mins.

Cover the dough with a tent of foil so that it does not touch the ball. It will double in bulk in about 35 minutes.

Preheat the oven to 375° about 20 minutes before baking.

Place the loaf in the middle shelf of the oven. Brush or spray with water twice during the 1-hour bake period. The crust will be a golden brown, but if it appears to be browning too quickly, cover with a piece of foil or brown sack paper the last 10 or 15 minutes.

Turn over the loaf and tap the bottom crust with a forefinger. A hard, hollow sound means the bread is baked. If not, return to the oven for an additional 10 minutes.

This is a handsome loaf that deserves a special presentation at the table—carried in as one would a suckling pig (it is after all, something from outer space).

I don't know where I found this, but it's all kinds of awesome!